Dad's been gone now for at least 18 months. He was laid to rest in mid November 2011. I've done much grieving since then and at times still do when a memory is triggered. I think of him everyday. I don’t write this post in sadness since Father's Day is a day to honor fathers and celebrate fatherhood. He lived a full life in spite of the fact that cancer took it away so unexpectedly and suddenly. Looking at old pictures of him as a young man seemed to indicate that he loved life. There were hints of this as I look at his smiling and then unwrinkled face from the late '40's to the early '70's. Towards the late '70's and all throughout the '80's as he advanced to late middle age, he transitioned from mostly grey to a full head of silver grey hair. In spite of this, people, most of the time, mistook him for at least ten years younger. His penchant for hard work and keeping active did much to keep his relatively youthful appearance. Decrepitude was further kept at bay toward the '90's when he had reached the seventh decade of his life. It would be a hot summer day in Harvey, Louisiana, but just like clockwork he would be outside tending the yard, building a shed, or whatever else needed mending, building, or trimming. Although for me and my siblings, he was at times stern, from my point of view, as I look back on it now, he was a good father and provider. He lived on this Earth for eighty eight years and by action alone up to his last days showed that he cared for us a lot. He wasn't entirely humorless and at times, on a rare occasion, show us his lighter side. On certain evenings, it was his time to cook and most often it was either fried fish, stewed vegetables, giniling (Filipino picadillo), or his specialty, the Filipino delicacy kilawin among other flavorful and traditional concoctions. Living in Louisiana, he also knew how to cook a good pot of red beans with smoked sausage His matter of fact mode of conversation to Mom or to some other person was a bit of welcome reassurance that everything was fine. Daddy you will be missed, your determination, your stern ways and perseverance ... and your cooking. You taught us well. And I thank you and will remember you forever. The following poem was stolen from a website but I found it appropriate for this occasion.
I Did Not Die
Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there I do not sleep
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am the diamond glints in the snow
I am the sunlight on the ripened grain
I am a gentle autumn’s rain
When you awaken in the morning hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
I am the birds in circled flight
I am the soft stars that shine at night
So don’t stand on my grave and cry
I am not there…I did not die
…Author unknown
